Its not about the money
Well, at least not for me it isn't.
When I set out to publish my first book, I honestly had no clue what I was getting myself into. My first book was a children’s book, a tribute to my oldest daughter and her desire to communicate with our deaf dog Porkchop. I had digested so much information about pre-verbal kids and their desire to communicate that I wanted to share my personal findings and give the concepts I had been exposed to a “medium” for other parents to explore with their children…
I certainly had no clue what a query letter was nor did I know that you had to have a literary agent …
I simply knew I had this story that I wanted to get out into the world. This story had reawakened my love for writing. Something that had been hibernating for quite some time.
I had numerous dreams that I had put on the back burner for so long. This story wouldn't allow writing to be one of them. Eventually I decided to self publish and after countless hours of researching how to self publish my book I came across Create Space which had just been launched by Amazon (now called Kindle direct publishing.) Amazon publishing has come a long way from its initial process for self publishing let me tell you.. The site was clunky and difficult to navigate but I did find their author support team very helpful. I needed an illustrator and didn't have a clue about how to find one.
“Check out your local college, you may find an up and coming illustrator!” said one of Create Space’s author support agents. This was actually great advice (and free!) I was able to find someone locally to create the illustrations I needed. Another new mom trying to keep her aspirations afloat. The illustrations were simple but they were exactly what I needed. She is now a clothing designer, her desire to create art was activated and hasn't turned off since.
When I finally self published my first book however, I didn't have the reaction I thought I would. I thought I would be elated, but I wasn’t. My inner critic who had been awfully quiet through the whole creative process decided that this would be a good time to make its self known.
I tore my book apart. I was my very own killjoy.
I spent weeks spiraling in self deprivation vowing not to write again when suddenly I realized that I was missing the whole fucking point.
Why did I write it in the first place?
I wrote it because I had a story that buried itself in my heart and never left.
I wrote it because I love writing, it feeds the creative side of me and keeps me inspired.
Think of your writing as a gift to the world.
“It’s such a gift for someone to tell you the truth, and it’s such a gift for someone to create art with the mess and the chaos and the despair of life, to have turned it into a song, a poem, a novel. It’s the hugest gift we have to offer one another.”
Anne Lamott
My writing is an offering, one that at times brings me to my knees. I am constantly humbled by the ability “to create art with the mess and chaos that is life” through my words. I am grateful to have an avenue to share my perspective, but most importantly I hold sacred my ability to create literary worlds of wonder that children from the Caribbean can Identify with.
So yeah, I didn’t do it for the money…
Why do you write?
